The New Collective Noun Campaign!

There's a sexy blog post title. It was going to be entitled 'Lazy post to remind occasional readers that I do still have access to a keyboard' but I omitted that in the interests of brevity.

Last week I was standing outside the Holland & Barratt on Villiers Street - it is the place to be - when a young girl came up to me and asked 'Do you want to end world poverty?'

Fearing that this may involve several years of diplomacy, a Phd. in economics, reform of the EU, an overhaul of the UN, and the establishment of participatory democracies in countries currently subject to tyrannical regimes, I politely replied 'No...not at the moment'*. While this encounter failed to illicit an appropriate level of charity in me it did make me think that our society is in desperate need of some new collective nouns....Here's a few half-arsed suggestions of my own but I'd be grateful to hear your contributions:

A nuisance of chuggers
An obesity of teenagers
A Hello of celebrities
An audit of accountants
A monotony of home-improvement programmes
A draught of real-ale campaigners
A clutch of Kwik-Fit fitters
A mute of chat-show hosts
A shower of meteorologists
A shoal of anglers
A blog of self-publicists

All other suggestions will be gratefully received...

*Jimmy Carr: A lady with a clipboard stopped me in the street the other day. She said, “Can you spare a few minutes for cancer research?” I said, “All right, but we’re not going to get much done.”